The Haruhi Experiment: Boy's Love
by Cronomage389
Summary: What happens when Haruhi plans on recruiting yaoi fangirls for the SOS Brigade? Will her promotional scheme cause more harm than good? MxM, Lemon, Oneshot, KyonxItsuki


The Haruhi Experiment: Boy's Love

Today began like any Haruhi-related episode of weirdness. Classes ended and once again I found myself wandering to the literature clubroom, now occupied by Haruhi's SOS Brigade. I entered the old room, Yuki Nagato glancing over a book in her corner as per usual.

She always had the same expression…no expression, through those yellow eyes. Itsuki Koizumi was just putting his bag down. He was the typical bishounen of any crappy anime series. Mikuru had yet to arrive, my starlit of the club.

And as if on cue, Haruhi barged through the door, "Meoooww!"

_Meow? What the hell…_

"Today my fellow brigade members we will be doing a nekoboy photo shoot!" She had two bags in her hand. Haruhi placed them on the table and pulled out a pair of cat ears and a tail from each bag.

"Kyon, Itsuki. I'm counting on you to pose nicely for me." She said aggressively pointing her finger at me.

"Why are you pointing at me!?"

"Because, you're the one who always thinks my ideas are stupid."

"Well yeah…" Haruhi cut me off adding,

"By doing this photo shoot, we will get a mass of yaoi fangirls to join our club and help us find aliens, time travelers, and espers. This is essential to our mission."

"Yaoi?" I questioned Haruhi.

"Yes, yaoi. You know boy's love, the kind of manga/anime that involves a love story between two male characters."Haruhi pulled out random manga with prettified guys holding each other with the ambiguous MATURE CONTENT label on each. "Itsuki, I declare you seme! And Kyon you are the uke!"

"Same-eh? O-kay?"

"Seme and uke, Kyon!" Haruhi pestered, her eyes glaring at me and inches from my face.

_Personal space Haruhi, at least give me a warning before you give me that demonic look again!_

"So, wait what are we doing now?" I scratched my head.

"You and Itsuki are going to wear these!" She chucked a tail and cat ears at each of us.

"And you shall pose for me while I take pictures to put up on our site." Haruhi grinned holding her digital camera.

"And what if I say…"

"If you say "No" Kyon then I will delete those files of Mikuru you have hidden on the…" I quickly put my hand against Haruhi's mouth. I heard footsteps which meant one thing.

"Hello, sorry I'm late. I had a test last period, hehe" Mikuru came in cheerily.

"Kyon, get your hands off me!" Haruhi exclaimed, kicking me to the floor.

"Now obey your leader." She evilly grinned. Haruhi grabbed the cat ears and placed them on my head, she wrapped the end of the tail around my belt. Itsuki complied, not waiting at all for another outburst from Haruhi.

"Now Itsuki, get close to Kyon…yeah that's it. Now put a hand under his chin and raise his head so your eyes meet his. Yeah, yeah, perfect!"

Goddamn it, this is just another way for Itsuki to get up in my face…though, he's kind of cute in those cat ears…The next declaration from Haruhi I was scared of…sorta.

"Now Kyon, lean up and kiss Itsuki!"

Maybe it was the fact that my day was already bad. Or maybe it was the fact that God had it against me, but…

Mikuru let out a yelp from Haruhi groping her. I looked up and instead of seeing Haruhi fondling Mikuru, my lips met Itsuki's. And Haruhi snapped a few pictures.

"Gah, Haruhi!" I spat from kissing Itsuki.

"Wha?" Haruhi replied. She was too preoccupied with Mikuru's melons as Mikuru continued her yelp.

"I don't want to be a part of this, if people are gonna see me and Itsuki lip-locked."

"C'mon, Kyon. It's necess.." Haruhi was cut off by me slamming the clubroom door shut. I walked out and headed for the bathroom…at least there Haruhi couldn't get a hold of me.

"There goes the meeting. Well if he's not going to comply I guess everyone is dismissed." Haruhi grabbed her bag and Itsuki's cat ears and tail. She ran out of the clubroom, heading home or to God knows where.

I waited awhile in that bathroom; finally the Sun was setting so I made my way back to the clubroom. When I closed the door I saw Itsuki was the only one in the room. He looked up from a game of solitaire he was playing.

"Hello Kyon, calmed down a bit from Haruhi's mischief?" He got up and walked towards me.

"…yeah, a little calmed I guess. What are you still doing here?" He reached me and put a hand against the door, right next to my head. All I could do was stare at his face. That gorgeous pretty boy fa-…I gotta stop thinking like that. Think of Mikuru's melons, think of Mikuru!

"So, was I really that bad tasting?" I gulped at Itsuki's comment.

"Umm…ah, eh" My face was flushed. I couldn't move; I was stuck there against the door.

"How about I give you a true taste" Itsuki smirked. He placed his lips on mine again. His soft skin…oh man! I can't help it anymore. Gah, I just hope my little sister doesn't like this kind of thing.

I gasped when Itsuki rubbed his leg against my groin. At that moment he stuck his tongue in me. And even though I am a guy, I wasn't complaining. I don't think anyone would. We swirled around each other's mouth and Itsuki began to take off my clothes.

Unbeknownst to me though, Haruhi didn't go home. She stuck around the school with her digital camera. She was in the building opposite the old building where our clubroom is. I couldn't tell because…well Itsuki feeling me up and all. But she was looking at us through a window and snapping more pictures for the site!

"Tsk tsk Kyon, now these will be a part of that yaoi game I'm forcing the computer club to make for me. We'll sell millions of copies; maybe even outsource girls from other high schools!" Haruhi…was in her own world, as always.

Itsuki had me completely disrobed. He went over to one of the lockers and pulled out some rope. Everything happened so fast; I remember lying there and then all of a sudden I was tied to a chair. Thankfully the cat ears were removed from my head.

"Itsuki...why was there rope in the lockers?"

"Do you really want to know what goes on in Haruhi's head?" _On second thought, nevermind._

Itsuki grabbed a water bottle from his backpack. He smirked as he popped the top. It was one of those cyclist water bottles.

"Umm…Itsuki, what do you think you're doing?" Of course I can't move, so running away now wouldn't work.

"This is to help you." _Something tells me it's not meant as a refreshment…_

Itsuki jammed the nozzle up my ass.

"Ahh! Itsuki that hurt!" But, that wasn't the end. He squeezed the bottle a few times, and the water went out of the bottle and into me. I felt a cold sensation enter me. My stomach gurgled with the unfamiliar order of things, something going in the back end and well, staying there.

"There there Kyon, it only gets better." Itsuki said and he pulled the bottle out of me too quickly, so some of the water leaked out. When it left me, it was more of a hot sensation as my muscles rolled back to let the bottle out.

Itsuki stood before me, fully naked, with his cock throbbing. _I guess I was providing it much needed attention._

"You should be all nice and wet for me now." He smiled stroking his dick a few times. Itsuki moved over and untied me from the chair, though my hands were still bound together. I didn't want to run away now. That foreplay got me all horny, I wanted a good fuck from him…do I believe the words I'm saying!? Agh, whatever just listen okay!

He sat down on the chair instead, and quickly grabbed me. He made me go on top of him, my body exposed for his eyes to see. I could feel the blood slowly leaving my cheeks to go elsewhere down further. Itsuki put his hands around my ass and held my butt cheeks apart. He slowly put his throbbing member inside me.

At first, I felt a bad burning sensation; I mean Itsuki is pretty big. Then, once a small portion was in the rest just slid up into me. All that water made it nice and easy for Itsuki.

"I'm going to move now okay?" Without waiting for me to reply he began to thrust up from sitting on the chair. Even though it was a small thrust, I could feel my muscles being stretched further; his cock was a maddening pleasure in my mind. I even helped a little, feeling very aroused I moved myself up and down Itsuki's length. He seemed to enjoy it. I remember him distinctly moving his head back gasping in ecstasy.

My cock was so hard from having Itsuki inside me. Oh man, that burning sensation soon turned into a soft sweet touch that rubbed me just the right way; I wanted more. So, I moved quicker, but that wasn't enough. I began to stroke myself while on top of Itsuki. Moaning out all the answers he wanted to hear.

"Feels good doesn't it Kyon!"

"Aah, yeaah. Haardeer Itsukii!" With that he lifted me up and sprawled me out on the table. Itsuki began thrusting like a ferocious animal. He really wanted to let his load out in me.

"…Itsuki" I gasped before grabbing onto his back. My mouth met his and we exchanged a hot kiss of passion, our tongues diving down each other's throats. At least I thought it would hold in our loud moans. I could feel my pre-cum drip from my hard cock. A sensation was rising up my shaft and it just reached my tip.

"Aah, Itsuki I'm gonna…" before I could finish he replied:

"Me too, just hold on!" Itsuki said, ramming into me. I felt his long dick brush up against my prostate, oh what a sensation that was. His cock rubbed against the walls of my ass, sending shivers of delight up and down my back. He gave one last hard thrust and cum gushed out. The hot steamy release went all the way up my ass. Some of it even oozed out because of how much Itsuki cummed. _Damn, hot bastard._

I gave out halfway through Itsuki's teeth clenching orgasm. My cock squirted a good couple of shots onto my abdomen. Afterward, we laid there for a bit. Me on the table and Itsuki…still up my ass.

I don't feel like talking about afterwards. I know Itsuki and I left in different directions. But, I think walking home, I realized I kind of…like Itsuki. But, anyways the next day came and went. At least the school day, and there I was again in the SOS Brigade's base of operations.

Haruhi was strangely energetic. She was busily working on the computer and Yuki was reading a book. Same old same old I guess. Itsuki came in late as usual, but Mikuru was the last to show. Another day my angel went missing. Mikuru was brave enough to go over to Haruhi and ask:

"What are you working on Haruhi?"

"Oh, just something for the fangirls. Y'know the whole boy's love bit. I got some good shots yesterday." She smiled; there was a twinkle in those eyes of hers.

"I wanna see! I wanna see!" Mikuru shouted, jumping up and down. When Mikuru peered over at the computer screen her face turned beet red. _Now I was interested…_

"Haruhi, what have you cooked up now?" I walked over and peered at a new page on our club website:

The Kyon x Itsuki fanclub board…and thus, life was never the same.

THE END


End file.
